4 Self-honoring practices for challenging times
I’ve been dealing with several things on a personal level that are BIG.
BIG family stuff, BIG school stuff with my son, BIG financial stuff. BIG things!
It’s the kind of BIG stuff that has required a lot of time and energy, major decision making, lengthy conversations with others, and me, showing up in all my vitality, beauty, and power.
In the past, I would have gone into crisis management mode, which has often looked and felt like hunkering down to prepare for the next attack. I would have shoved self-care to the margins, focused all my energy outward, leaving very little for myself, and pushed my way through with little attention or care to what all of this was doing to me.
But I’ve learned that one of the most important things to remember when BIG stuff seems to be raining down from the sky is to practice proper care and management of my energy.
There are 4 things I practice regularly that help me to maintain a high level of presence, responsiveness, and confidence, especially when life could easily drag me into overwhelm, resentment, and burnout. They are:
Radical Permission.
Simplification.
Honoring my emotions.
Leaning into reliable support.
I talk about the importance of Radical Permission a lot — the permission that only you can give to yourself. Radical Permission means listening to and honoring the needs, wants, and requirements that you have for yourself — not what someone else says is okay, or what an outside authority expects from you.
So, first thing’s first, I’ve stepped into Radical Permission to go through this time with as much gentleness and generosity towards myself as possible. I know I am just as, if not more important, than everything that is going on. As a result, I’ve made myself my own priority, as are my rest, my self-care, and my joy.
Instead of believing I must neglect myself to take care of everything and everyone else, I know I come first. Everything else comes second to my well-being. Giving myself this kind of permission has changed everything for the better and has helped me discern what I give my precious energy to.
Secondly, I’ve chosen to simplify things considerably in both my personal and work lives. In the past this would have felt scary to do because so much of my identity and worth were tied up in my achievements and productivity. But I now know that it’s healthy and good for my life to not always be so full and busy. There will also be times when I need to be more intentional with what I’m giving my attention and energy to, and that is perfect and good and necessary, too.
Discerning which things to let go of or postpone because they aren’t as urgent or pressing has freed me up to be present and powerfully available for the things that are. It’s allowed me to still prioritize the things that are most important to me — my health, good sleep, my son, and enjoying my life — while all this other stuff has been happening. Simplifying things has helped me keep my energy available for the enjoyment of my life, which is right where it needs to be.
Thirdly, I’ve given myself space and time to acknowledge my feelings. I’ve felt the full gamut of emotion these past few weeks, and sometimes I’ve had to override what I was feeling to be able to function and do what’s needed to be done. So, I’ve made time for those feelings to be recognized and honored so that they don’t build up and become an obstacle without the resolution it deserves.
As a result, my feelings have informed my self-care. There have been days when I’ve needed more sleep, which has meant I go to bed earlier. There have been days when all I’ve wanted was comfort, which has informed what I make for dinner, or how I dress, or what my daily movement practice looks like. There have been days when fear was very present for me, and I’ve needed time to befriend it and learn from it, so that I wasn’t being driven by it.
Taking the time to appreciate my feelings has helped me to move through them with a bit more ease, all while managing my energy and my life, and all the complexity therein.
Finally, I’ve really leaned on the kindness and clarity of friends and my support system. It’s amazing how a simple conversation, or an exchange of messages, or a willing ear has helped me to feel seen and loved — even if I’m still up to my eyeballs with “stuff”.
I’ve received encouragement, valuable reflections, and a lot of “I’m here for you”, which has felt so very reassuring. All of this has grounded me in my own strength and inner knowing, which can feel hard to access when I’m really “in it”. Leaning on reliable support has helped me to remember to look at the bigger picture, to rest in the knowing that everything is going to be okay (even if I don’t always believe it right away), and to conserve my energy for where it is really needed.
Radical Permission.
Simplification.
Honoring my emotions.
Leaning into reliable support.
These 4 practices have helped me manage my energy and walk through this prickly time with greater clarity, poise, and peace. They’ve helped me honor and choose myself, when it would have been so easy to neglect, sacrifice, and abandon myself, instead.
These 4 practices have helped me to stay focused on what truly matters, keep my heart open, and honor my health, sanity, and well-being, too.
May my story inspire you to honor yourself when BIG things come up, and you’re being stretched in ways you didn’t know you could stretch.
May this help you to remember how important you and your well-being are when everything and everyone is clamoring for your time, energy, and attention.
May reading this encourage you to stand for what really matters — YOU and your JOY! — even when so much is happening around you that might convince you to believe otherwise.
PS: If you’re ready to harness these powerful practices for navigating challenging times, reach out to me directly by responding to this email and we will find a time to talk.
PPS: If you’re curious about Radical Permission, download my free pdf about it here!
Originally published on https://aliciamorrow.com/